Meeting the One: An Unexpected Lesson in Dating Chemistry

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A few weeks back I got to write a snippet of the story about how I met my husband. I was delighted when an editor friend of mine asked if I’d write something more about relationships that take a long time to start fizzling, as opposed those with instant chemistry 🙂 Click straight on over to The Well, or read a snippet here first….


This is how the conversation usually goes:

Curious person: “So, how did you and your husband meet?”
Me: “Funny enough, we met on my front doorstep.”
Curious person: “Oooh! Was it love at first sight?”
Me: “No. Not even close.”

Our story had much more awkward beginnings: he was late to dinner, dressed in a jacket that should have stayed in 1987, and he mumbled a very awkward “don’t I know you from somewhere?” — arguably the second worst pick-up line ever. Then there were weeks of misfired conversation, a DTR which revealed that he thought I was being flirty when I was trying to be friendly, followed by a few more weeks of silence.

And then, somehow, our paths crossed again and I found myself interested in getting to know him. We started dating, even though I had put him firmly in the category of Not My Type. He was quiet, reserved, and didn’t seem to have the social chutzpah which I thought a man would need to have to deal with someone as outgoing, over-educated and outspoken as me.

And yet.

Yet, even though he didn’t look like My Type, or sound like My Type, I found myself wanting him to think well of me. Slowly, I conceded that perhaps My Type needed an update…..

(Click here to continue reading over at The Well…)

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4 thoughts on “Meeting the One: An Unexpected Lesson in Dating Chemistry”

  1. I went over to The Well but thought I’d comment here. In my marriage, I’m the quiet, reserved one and my husband the extroverted social one. I’ve read several times over the yrs that introverts and extroverts often end up married. We have a really great marriage (it has been almost 22 yrs now) and I think one reason is that we balance each other out so well. I can’t imagine being married to another introvert – it would be terrible! haha! But seriously. Two of us so solemn, melancholy, etc – it would not be good.

    1. Yes! I think in some confused, complementarian thinking I had thought that to find someone who would be a spiritual ‘leader’ to me, they would have to have the same strengths as me… But just more of them! Oh, His ways are higher than our ways…

  2. I LOVE his very worst pick up line ever!!! AHHAHAHAHAH! I will have to share it with my man-children….2 are married, but I promise you that the youngest one will use it on his long time girlfriend! THANKS!

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