Three Words To Sum It All Up: Lessons from a 3000 Mile Roadtrip

We took a 3,000 mile road-trip this summer. We packed camping gear and snacks and clothes and kids into the back of our minivan, and headed towards Yellowstone: the oldest and most prestigious of America’s National Parks.

We saw dinosaur bones, and glaciers, and sharp jagged teeth of mountains jutting into the air.



We saw sulphuric pits spewing dragon’s breath, and colossal geysers.



We skipped stones and paddled canoes, we huddled against each other as it hailed. We took photos of all things brights and beautiful, all creatures great and small.




We paddled on the most tranquil of waters, and picked our way through intricate subterranean lava caverns.




We laughed with friends old and new, and collected family stories which we will tell, and retell, and retell.

At the end of our trip, I collated our photos and uploaded some of them onto Facebook so our far-flung family could share in the sights of a land they’ve not seen. And of course: put like that, in a photo album, it looks like the trip of a lifetime. And, perhaps it was.

But really, that’s not the whole story. I joked with a friend a while ago that if I were to start this blog again, perhaps I would call it “Not Pictured”. Because not pictured in that photo album were the many hours we spent driving. And driving. And driving. And how we had to stop every thirty minutes because Mommy, I need to pee.

Not pictured were the tantrums. Or the whining faces of Are we there yet? Not pictured was the sweat of pitching and striking a tent every one to two days, while we swatted away kids and mosquitos to get the work done faster. Not pictured were the potty accidents. Or the hours we spent in dingy laundromats on the road, having rooted around in our bags to find the least stinky items of clothing to wear during the wash.

Not pictured were the bouts of anxiety our eldest struggled with as we moved through campsites with bears and thunderstorms and hail, culminating in her asking one morning with tears brimming: “Mommy, did you know there would be storms out here?” I told her we didn’t know exactly what the weather would be like, but that we had prepared for a number of possibilities. She was having none of it. “Didn’t you think of the children at all when you planned this trip?” she accused. Also not pictured: me sniggering instead of comforting my tearful daughter.

And so, when we returned home, people said: “How was your trip? Your pictures were amazing!”

And truthfully, I had to answer: “It was great. Except for the parts that were boring or terrible.”

In the weeks since we returned home, our days have fallen the routine of the school year. We have sourced shoes one size bigger, figured out the car pool, and developed a rhythm for the various activities that have been dropped into our calendar like tetris time capsules. We have first-day-of-school pictures and slowly-growing art folders to prove it. And now that we are settling in, people are asking: “How are you guys doing? How’s the school year?”

And truthfully, the answer is the same: “It’s great. Except for the parts that are boring or terrible.”

I’m thinking that maybe these are the three words that are true for all of life, pictured or not. The blessed life is one which is “great, except for the parts that are boring or terrible.” For none of us, no matter what story that pictures tell us, are exempt from suffering, and none of us lives a life which doesn’t have stretches of the just-plain-boring. There is nothing exciting about loading and unloading a dishwasher. Or learning your times tables. Or flossing your teeth. But that doesn’t mean life isn’t as great as it can be.

One day, of course, our firm hope is that we will be with God, and the “boring parts” will all be rest, and the “terrible parts”  will all have been wiped away as tears from our eyes. When we see him face to face, it will be great all the time.

But until then: this is how it is, and really this is the most this one blessed life could hope to be: Great, except for the parts that are boring or terrible.

My house is not messy

My House is Not Messy... It is filled with signs of life.and love.

My house is not messy. It is well loved.

This table with paint smears and squished grapes, pock marked by forks – this table tells of fables fashioned by four year old fingers. It speaks of meals eaten together, children at home. My table is not messy. It tells tales of joy.

This floor with mud tracks and dump trucks arrayed underfoot – this floor speaks of a treasure found in the yard and brought in to share with wonder, of cities built and leveled, of civilizations conquered. My floor is not messy. It is the evidence of exploration.

This kitchen with breadcrusts and half drunk cups of water, with pots stacked high in the drying rack, sink stacked high with dishes awaiting their turn in the dishwasher – it speaks of meals together, friends invited, bodies nourished. My kitchen is not messy. It is a hearth of hospitality.

This garden with knee-high grass and a proliferation of plastic toys, with overgrown bushes and its smattering of barely-tended vegetables – this garden speaks of more time spent ho-ho-hoing than hoe-hoe-hoeing. It speaks of play. It speaks of “helpers” whose help needs much help. My garden is not messy. It is cultivating people.

This living room with pillows on the floor, grime marks on the window, books strewn in every corner – it speaks of reading forts and high adventure. My living room is not messy. It is a room we live and love in.

Another Monday morning brings another survey of my home. My eyes see mess, my brain processes it with panic: fix it! you’re failing!

But another Monday brings another week of experience in learning to read the story told by the debris: this is the story of life. My house is not messy, it is well loved, and people are welcome to LIVE here. Messy people with messy lives are welcome on our messy couch. Messy stories are welcome in our messy kitchen. Your mess is welcome here, because in this house you are not messy, you are well loved.

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